Marriage, like parenting, is messy, complicated, beautiful, emotional, and imperfectly perfect. We learn so much about ourselves through our relationships, for the people we do life with often hold up a mirror to our most triggering aspects. I experience wild comfort in knowing I married my best friend – someone who constantly reminds me that I’m enough, as I explore, evolve, and cultivate new sides of myself.
As human beings, we make relationships hard by initially painting them as easy. Real-life relationships are not exactly what we grew up watching in Romantic Comedies. They require work, and sacrifice, and tolerance. They are our biggest lessons in joy, sadness, loss. And, most importantly, while they don’t always promise happy endings, they crack our hearts wide open in the process, leaving us better, wiser, and certainly stretched out of our comfort zones.
So, this Father’s Day, whether you’re a dad, a single parent, an uncle, a grandfather, a bonus parent, or a single mom – this day is for you.
Why? Because your kids are paying attention. In showing up for them, you are shaping them, molding them, and helping them cultivate their most resilient selves. In reading this, I hope you don’t feel compelled to feel perfect, or solid, or totally brave. You’re allowed to be a work in progress – tangled, fearless, afraid. In fact, your kids will be grateful having beared witness to your evolution, so long as you embrace that fear, and choose to keep showing up anyway.
I love my husband for so many reasons, and one of the biggest reasons that makes that love so strong has to do with how he shows up as a parent to our kids. And while we have somewhat of a non-traditional situation, here are a few things that my husband strives to instill in our children:
The notion that hard work is non negotiable. How crucial it is to “feel the fear and do it anyway.” Living bolding and daring greatly. That no act of love should ever go unnoticed. That family is everything. That love always wins. That no opportunity to give should be overlooked. To know your worth.
And the real truth is – we’re not always on the same page. We argue over the parenting minutia that’s typical in any relationship. We butt-heads, we stand stubbornly in our opinions and decisions. And while we’re each quick to stand our ground and defend our positions, we also comfortable enough within ourselves to wipe the slate clean, to love each other through our disagreements, and show up united in order to provide a strong foundation for our kids. We try not to sweat the small stuff, we do the work, and, on our best day, we are insync and winning together.
Parenting is harder when we pretend it’s not hard. It IS SO FUCKING hard. It’s SO MUCH FUCKING work. And to make it work, you have to be aligned and willing to not win all of the time.
So, in honor of Father’s Day, I turned to my kids to express some of the ways they know their dad is showing up for them. I hope this brings a smile to your face, or prompts you to let your _______ ( dad / mom / husband / uncle / grandfather / parent / best friend) know how much you appreciate them. Thank them for doing the most “ok” job, because you are most likely their proudest moment.
Happy Father’s Day!
65 Comments
Christine
That’s a lovely post, awesome pictures and adorable video. <3 I'm dropping a comment to let you know the other pictures from the shoot uploaded to wp-content but not used in the post can be accessed by everyone with a minimum of knowledge (in case you want to either remove them/remove access). Cheers and happy father's day to your family. 🙂
Kellie
Very cute!!
Shelly Dalton
Great blog today, and very true. My hubby and I were married 46 years. (2 kids, 5 grand) Life’s a roller coaster enjoy the ride.
BTW Tom, Shep and Odette are growing so fast, and they’re adorable. Luv ya, Shelly D.
Kimberly
Gen, that was a great blog…and i was the mom and dad but that hit home for me..raising my kids alone was FUCKING HARD!, but the most rewarding thing i have ever done and i would do it all over again if i could because they are adults now and can’t even describe how bad i want my babies back..but needless to say i am so very proud of them and how they always tell me i am the best mom and appreciate everything i have done for them even the dicipline..so thank you Gen for those words of comfort and wisdom❤
hela
what a wonderful article, i enjoyed it a lot 🙂
you are such an inspiration! thank you so much x
(+ your kids really are the sweetest)
Sue Cherry
What a beautiful tribute. He is so lucky to have you in his corner. Thank you for sharing a little part of your family with us. And Odette’s laugh just cracked me up.
MJ
So beautiful! So touching! Amazing video! Those kids are great! They totally admire their dad you can see it in their little faces.
Cristianr
Beautiful gen happy fathers to Jared and all fathers. I love family ??❤
Cristiane
Beautiful gen happy fathers to Jared and all fathers. I love family ??❤
Elena Alkhimova
Hello, Genevieve! What a good family you have. I’m so glad that your wonderful children grow up in such great love. Thank you for sharing such beautiful pictures. Happy father’s day to the most wonderful and caring daddy Jared
Eli
This is so well written, i loved it!
I don’t have a strong bond with my father, but this article made me realize that he’s always trying his best, no matter what. Thank you, parents from all over the world, for taking care of our lives until we’re ready to stand on our feet by ourselves!
And thank you Gen for writing this, love is always important to celebrate.
Tiana
How sweet. Happy father’s day!
Beth
So inspired to read this post as my partner is about to be a new dad and I feel so more confident now that we don’t need to be perfect parents and it’s okay to disagree on some things thank you for the constant updates and advice you give to us
eli
This is amazing, i loved to read it!
I don’t have a strong bond with my father, but reading this article made me realize that even though he’s absent most of the time, he’s trying his best to keep up with us. Being a parent really is the most difficult job in the world, so thank you parents all over the world for keeping our souls safe until we can look after our own!
(p.s, thank you Gen for writing this beautiful article!)
Elisa
This is amazing, i loved to read it!
I don’t have a strong bond with my father, but reading this article made me realize that even though he’s absent most of the time, he’s trying his best to keep up with us. Being a parent really is the most difficult job in the world, so thank you parents all over the world for keeping our souls safe until we can look after our own!
(p.s, thank you Gen for writing this beautiful article!)
Heather
MY HEART IS SO WARM
Elisa Brogren
Aww, such a precious video. Your kids sure are adorable – and so lucky to have the both of you as parents ^_^
Happy Father’s Day to Jared! xx
Dominique Spoor
Hi Gen,
what a beautiful words. I am a single mother of 2 daughters 17 and 19 years old. my daughters all have a disability, the oldest has autism and the youngest ADD. We have a hard time behind us and have survived. Through all the struggles you do yourself too short, but if I now see how my daughters enjoy life I am proud that I am their mother. Phase 1 of the basic upbringing is over, now we are in phase 2 … boyfriends ?. I love my children very much.
Vanessa Heinze
So beautifully said. It’s amazing how the two of you keep such a normal life for your children given the non traditional lives you live.
Dominique Spoor
Hi Gen,
what a beautiful words. I am a single mother of 2 daughters 17 and 19 years old. my daughters all have a disability, the oldest has autism and the youngest ADD. We have a hard time behind us and have survived. Through all the struggles you do yourself too short, but if I now see how my daughters enjoy life I am proud that I am their mother. Phase 1 of the basic upbringing is over, now we are in phase 2 … boyfriends ?. I love my kids.
And i love the way you and youre family are so open to us, that makes you verry human thank you for that.?
Greetings from the Netherlands
Dominique
LolaBee
I love this blog . I’m not a parent yet but I know I will be one day soon . I hope I have a family like yours .
That video made me cry from happiness . It is just so beautiful !
You’re doing better than an ok job . All parents are ! I know just from being an Auntie how much hard work kids can be . Sadly , life isn’t as perfect as the movies . But that’s what makes life interesting 🙂
Keep being wonderful ! ?
Dominique
Hi Gen,
what a beautiful words. I am a single mother of 2 daughters 17 and 19 years old. my daughters all have a disability, the oldest has autism and the youngest ADD. We have a hard time behind us and have survived. Through all the struggles you do yourself too short, but if I now see how my daughters enjoy life I am proud that I am their mother. Phase 1 of the basic upbringing is over, now we are in phase 2 … boyfriends ?. I love my kids.
And i love the way you and youre family are so open to us, that makes you verry human thank you for that.?
Greetings from the Netherlands
Dominique
Catherine Abney
My parents have been married 51yrs. I don’t remember a day when they 100% agreed on how to raise myself and my 4 siblings. I do know that thur God’s grace they managed. It’s my parents greatest joy to see how all their kids have grown into the adults we are today.
I hope you & Jared experience that same joy on day.
I had no idea Jared’s middle name is Nichole ?
Happy Father’s Day to Jared ?
Catherine
What a great post! Thanks for taking the time to remind people that relationships are hard work, whether it is with children or significant others, and for showing how important it is for parents to be there to support and parent (-not- befriend) their children. What is “manusha?” It that similar to minutia/minutiae? Hope you all have an amazing day!
Nadia
I’m married to my soulmate, we have two kids together and i can relate 100% to everything you just wrote. Much ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️ to you, your hubby and your beautiful kids. ?
Lina
Love you and god bless you , happy Father’s Day to Jared ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
Genie Kennedy
Thank you for your beautiful & inclusive prose!!! Your video is a spectacular Father’s Day gift!!! Thanks for sharing your delightful family & the beauty and reality of parenting. Happy Father’s Day Jared!!!
Brenda
That was beautiful. I was a single mom and in some ways in some things I think it was easier. My word was ultimate and I didn’t have to negotiate. But I know my son missed out on a precious relationship and I worked to fill the void. A strong supportive father shows boys how to be good men and shows girls how to have healthy relationships with men. Happy Fathers day to Jared. Bless your family with love and happiness.
Tena
Perfect blog post, you have it spot on. Being there for your children in a united way even when you disagree. My parents didn’t and I was raised by a grandmother. My ex didn’t work with me on that united front and it hurt our son.
I think you and yours will get it right.
Kim
Gen, that amazing message hit home for me i am a single mom and i was also dad of course and yes it was FUCKING HARD I HAVE 2 BOYS BRANDON 5 ZANE 2 i got divorced when they were that age butthey are 25 and 19 now..i would give anything to have my babies back this job was and is the most rewarding job ever..i did all this with being bipolar 1 and all by myself they were and are my reason for being because with out them who knows where i would be..i feel i did a good job my 19 yr old lives in Tennessee thriving and so happy and my older one struggles but he gives it all he has everyday he also has health issues but he does it on his own….the biggest part that is rewarding even though we went through hell and back several times they always i mean always tell me i did a fantastic job and how much they love and actually thank me for all i do i am blessed beyond measure..and so are you and your beautiful perfectly inperfectly family..your blog was perfect❤
SANDRA L BROWN
It is nice to see that others find parenting hard. It is so difficult to raise smart, happy, well-adjusted and confident kids in this world.
Milica
This is beautiful 🙂 Thank you for sharing this moments with us <3
Jacelyn
This was so great! I loved the video, super cute:)
Happy father’s day Jared!!!
Ravi Teja
After reading this post and watching the video first thing I did was to msg my Dad. Staying away from him in another country is very hard for me. But achieving my goals is the only gift I could give him. He is my hero.
Dina Nimmo
Gen this is a beautiful post, and thanks so much for sharing your family with us. You & Jared have made an amazing family with happy kids. Unfortunately my dad has past, but this post put into words of how I would describe my dad. So happy father’s Jared and all of the “dads” out there.
Michelle
“I hope you don’t feel compelled to feel perfect, or solid, or totally brave. You’re allowed to be a work in progress – tangled, fearless, afraid”
This spoke to me so much.. Im at a stage where I want to start a family but I’m terrified of getting it all wrong, am I strong enough? What if I can’t manage? But your words made so much sense an gave me a sense of peace. What matters is me showing up and the love I have to give. My new mantra! A heavy weight has been lifted!
Thank you xx
Donna Y.
Beautifully said.
I am not a parent and I admire you & Jared, and all parents, that take up the journey of parenting. You two are doing such an amazing job with your kids, they are so fortunate and you are so blessed. I love how united you stand together, though I’m sure it’s a lot of work to get there sometimes. I love how y’all Love! XO ❤
Tracy Jones
I have been married 33 yrs. We have 5 children and 5 grandchildren. Love this blog. Marriage and parenting is so full of ups and downs. It’s the compromising that makes it work. You have adorable children. Thanks for sharing the video.
Randi Ramblns
I married my best friend in 1990. First daughter in 1995. Second daughter 1999. He got killed 2000. He was satisfied with two daughters. He loved us so much. ? I love your blog, Instagram and YouTube channel. Thanks for sharing your family and thoughts with us. ??
Herissa
It’s all so beautiful. Happy fathers day!
Rachel Wang
What song is “nobody can drag me down”? I’m really curious and always down for more music suggestions. You both are wonderful parents and Happy Father’s Day!
Abigail
As a family, we’ve gone through some pretty tough stuff… from my dad being diagnosed with cancer, his business going bust, having to move house in under a month.. for me, it’s difficult. Like, really difficult. It’s hard for my sisters and myself to get a grip on what’s happening and accept that life can be this way.. but with the help of our parents we’re beginning to understand a lot more. That everything’s gonna be okay. My mum is just amazing, and my dad is able to stay strong for his kids even when he doesn’t want to, even through depression, cancer and anxiety. He really is a great dad, even if he can’t see it most days. He’s my hero. I hope he sees that. And I hope you know that you and your family have helped me a lot these past through months just by posting on your blog and your Instagram. Love you! Happy Fathers Day. <3
Amber
Beautiful post! Love the video! ???
Kady
I’ll bet that, when Jared sees this, he’ll laugh, cry, and be the proudest dad ever. The most loved. He deserves all the love and praise for the dad-the man-he is.
You’re pretty awesome yourself, Gen! I love you all!
Catherine
Happy Father’s day to Jared ?
Hope you had a quite day ??
Alice
Thank you for continuing to let us into your lives. This is such a beautiful blog
Dena
Love this. And I LOVE the term bonus-parent!!! ?
Sandi M
I love watching This family and how the dynamics change as the kids change. I thank you and Jared for sharing your lives with us. What we do for our children stay with them all their lives. The love parents show each other, or towards others, help shape who they become. You two are fine examples.
Amanda
That was so sweet! Thank you for sharing with us! ❤️
SanaNaaz
Thank you for sharing your life with is. I read your blog and it inspires me to be a good person and a good parent someday.
Ivana
All true… Parenting is so fucking hard but we are all doing it with so much love that we dont even realize it’s hard… As you said Gen, we are all doing different and we stand for what we believe but at the end of the day we did it together and we manage to be the best parents our kids can have.
Happy Father’s day
Shannon
Love this! Just a quick note – it’s spelled minutiae. Congrats on your beautiful family, and thanks for admitting it takes work!
Scoutiessenses
Wow, I was totally blown away by this post. I read it expecting the familiar shit like “ I love my husband, he’s such a great dad” story. But I felt your truth in the article, and I loved it. Your honesty and love shown through this post. Thank you. You and @jarpad are awesome, self aware parents doing the best for their kids out of love.
Tena
Beautiful. No matter how messy it can get, being united for children and each other is always the best thing we can give our kiddos.
Margaret
First of all, those pics and the vids are precious. Odette saying no, no, no had me in stitches. Thank you for writing this. Our family also had to deal with Dad being gone most of the time; he traveled almost every week for his job. Reconnecting when they were small was often awkward because he hadn’t seen what had transpired during the week and even though I was trying to recount it, it ended up failing in translation, lol. We didn’t have Face Time or Skype when mine were little like yours, and I LOVE that you are taking advantage of those tools to keep everyone connected. Mine are older, but tonight? I had to Face Time my son’s boxer with him while he laid on the beach in Miami. The things we do. Truly enjoy your blog, Gen. And, I have converted roughly 10 of my friends and family into rabid Fab Fit Fun addicts! Have a wonderful summer. Namaste.
Rahel Daka
Wow, this video just melts my heart. You have such a beautiful family that radiates so much love and happiness. Have a wonderful Father’s Day!
Kimberly Blitz
Very beautifully written and so incredibly true. I wish my ex husband and i had realized how hard and how much work you have to put into a marriage and raising a family before we got married, it might have changed my children’s lives. While they are both strong hardworking adults now they had it rough with divorced parents. We divorced for many reason but the basic reason was we could never get on the same page pushing and pulling but never meeting in the middle.
You have a beautiful family. Keep doing what your doing.
Kathy Petersen
This is a wonderful blog and video, your children are adorable. Thank you for sharing with us.
Happy Father’s Day to Jared.
Liz
This resonates with me right now as my daughter hits the dreaded teens and her changing personality sometimes comes across as not caring. My husband and I are there supporting each other through it and his love and strength mean so much with even the smallest gesture (which this morning was just holding me while i sobbed over her attitude!)
Loved the video! you’re doing an awesome job guys
xo
Reci
I love this post. Happy Father’s day. You have a beautiful family.
Lynn
Terrific article, Gen. It emphasizes the most important thing in any relationship: compromise. Without that, there is no relationship. Nowadays we live in an increasingly “no compromise” world, but it is the glue that holds marriages, families, communities, and whole societies together. Looking forward to more of your inspiring words.
Vivian Okoro
Loved that video.
Jennifer
This was adorable! Odette’s laugh, OMG! It’s just like Jared’s. Out of the mouths of babes….
Tracey
Gen,
Thank you so much for this beautiful, honest, sweet and realistic post! Marriage is fucking hard….parenting is fucking hard…..that’s the honesty I’m referring to. I love that!! Such a great gift to Jared! (And to us!) I honestly don’t know how you manage 3 kids while Jared works so far away. You rock too!! You’re both great parents!! It’s evident by seeing & hearing your kids. The love shines through! Thank you for sharing this, for keeping it real, and for your blog, which is continually inspiring. Thank you guys for being such a blessing to each other, to your kids, and to your fans. Happy Father’s Day to Jared!!!
Blessings, Tracey
Ps: did I mention how cute your kids are? This video put a huge smile on my face! I love hearing small kids talk—they’re so real, so raw, so adorable. I hope Odette keeps that laugh!!!
Jean
Hi! Gen aka Ruby. I’m a supernatural fan here. I love your thoughs, these words are soooo amazing,. Thanks for sharing. xoxo